I think my wife might be a witch – Miscellaneous – Expats Portugal Community Forum
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I think my wife might be a witch

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Posts: 1925
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Topic starter
(@old-bloke)
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Joined: 13 years ago

Picture the scene.

Mrs OB & I are sat quietly watching the TV, the dog sleeping on her lap, the cat on mine, all is peaceful......

The cat suddenly sits up as if she's seen something then we start to hear a low rumbling like thunder in the distance (the cat doesn't like thunder). The rumbling grows louder and starts to sound differently, more like a large lorry is approaching. That's not right though, large lorries can't get up to us, the gate is shut and Mrs OB's car is parked on the track up to the house.

As are minds are trying to process what is happening the cat explodes off my lap in a ball of fur and takes refuge in the bedroom. The dog, reacting to the cat rocket, sits up and in his half-asleep state doesn't know whether to chase the cat or bark. He decides to bark when the windows suddenly start rattling.

Bear in mind this is all happening very quickly and I am still in the process of getting up to investigate this intrusion into our tranquillity. Then the windows stop their rattling and it's as silent as the grave, no nightjars burbling away, no owls hooting, no village dogs barking, nothing, not a sound.

Mrs OB announces "that was an earthquake", my old brain processes what has taken place and the only explanation is there was an earthquake or a land slide on one of the hills surrounding us.

Within a few minutes the IPMA site is showing a magnitude 2.8 earthquake at Pampillosa de Serra, some 50 km away by road, about 20 km as the crow flies.

Now you may be asking yourself why does this sequence of events make me think Mrs OB is a witch. Well let me tell you that one morning, about a week ago, over our first cuppa of the day she told me that overnight she had dreamt that there had been an earthquake that had caused the track retaining wall to collapse and her car had gone tumbling down the hill and was wrecked. She was that concerned by her dream she immediately started parking her car in a different spot where it couldn't fall down the hill.

At that time I had just put it down to her starting to go a bit doo-lally and thought it's approaching the time when I need to place the old dear in care. After last night I'm starting to think that she's not going daft & in fact she might be a witch. This is not the first time she's dreamt something and it's subsequently happened (I even had to stop riding a motorbike to keep the peace after she'd dreamt that I had had a crash on it and a few months later the new owner did crash it). Now I know garlic can protect me from vampires but what can be used as protection against witches?

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Posts: 1274
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(@crazy-russian)
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Joined: 15 years ago

in many countries it is considered good luck to have a witch in the house
indeed in Hungary the selling of witches (doll type/size not live ones) is a successful industry both for locals and tourists

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Posts: 1173
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(@topmast)
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Joined: 13 years ago

Just make sure you hide her broomstick!!

Mrs. T.

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Posts: 2317
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(@x-camone)
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Joined: 12 years ago

By coincidence, this appeared in The Guardian on Friday last

In answer to your question

Now I know garlic can protect me from vampires but what can be used as protection against witches?

I see you as a possible for the character in the last photo.

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Posts: 1925
VIP Member
Topic starter
(@old-bloke)
Noble Member
Joined: 13 years ago

I see you as a possible for the character in the last photo.

I wouldn't dispute that, and it could be Mrs OB in the 13th picture.

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